Workshop 11: The “Deal Breaker”: Detection and Intervention
The PACT therapist is always moving couples toward secure functioning. A deal breaker is a conflict between partners for which there is no workable solution. Deal-breakers lead partners to a dead-end and therefore threaten the existence of the relationship. However, when reaching this dead-end, many partners will bend reality and simply kick the can down the road, deferring the deal-breaker into the future. The couples therapist must play the long game as partners almost always are playing the short game. To them, facing a deal-breaker squarely triggers fear of loss, and so it is avoided. If secure functioning is to be a therapeutic goal, the couples therapist has a duty to keep partners from bending reality and avoiding deal-breakers. In this two-hour workshop, attendees will learn how to detect large and small deal-breakers and how to apply a well-defined process for guiding the couple toward dissolving the deal-breaker for good.
- List at least three examples of deal-breakers
- Identify, amplify and work through deal-breakers
- Apply at least three interventions for dealing with deal-breakers